Tuesday, June 07, 2016 - Updated: 2:13 PM
For those who haven’t heard, the Norwoods went north to Alaska last week.
This space could slowly and with great detail recall that adventure, from the crowded streets of Pike’s Market in Seattle to the chilly village wharf along Skagway. But really, reading about other people’s summer vacations is only slightly less interesting than looking at their Facebook pictures of them. So, in an interest to keep everyone from swiping right (which, in the case of a newspaper would take you to our Obituaries page), I’ve decided to give you a few travel tips.
On a personal note, this week’s column was written somewhere between Denver and St. Louis.
• The first tip is don’t wear sandals to the bathroom at Seattle-Tacoma International Airport.
• Never let your seven-year-old daughter have the window seat on a four hour plane ride. Sure, she’ll like looking out the window, but the flight attendants will make at least two trips throughout the cabin offering up sodas.
As this week’s biology lesson, a seven-year-old’s bladder is somewhere between the size of a pea (note the “a” there) and a really small pearl.
The size of the bladder combined with the ample flow of beverages means that if you’re on the aisle seat, be prepared to let your child in and out roughly 16 times between Utah and Iowa.
• Take bug spray.
As western Kentuckians we become accustomed to mosquitos big enough to carry off small dogs.
We also tend to have a magical view of the rest of the world, from the white sand beaches of Florida to the top of Seattle’s Space Needle.
The truth is, they all have one thing in common: bugs.
They’re everywhere. Gnats, mosquitos, ants. They’re out there and they’re trying to eat you alive.
• There’s no such thing as a free taxi.
• Enjoy the people next to you.
Not just your friends and family.
You see those people every day.
While you’re waiting in line after you order lunch, ask the person beside you what they chose. Riding the trolley back after a long day, ask the person in the seat across from you what they did.
At worse they think you’re completely crazy and ignore you. Which is ok, since you’ll probably never see them again.
But at best you might make someone’s day a little better.